Jade Varden Official Blog

There's an entire school of thought that certain substance abuse doesn't hinder your mind, it frees it. If you get drunk enough, you'll be open to all sorts of new ideas and imaginings. You may even finally get over that writer's block and figure out the ending of your book.  This a school of thought that was clearly developed by someone who was actually drunk at the time. Writing and drinking do not mix, and I don't care how many famous authors have said that they do.  Alcohol  It's pretty much common knowledge that Mark Twain liked to drink. Hemingway famously drank all the time. Edgar Allen Poe and F. Scott Fitzgerald both liked to his the sauce, and let's not even talk about Hunter S. Thompson. There are so many authors who were known for drinking just in America, NPR did a whole show about it . And now they're all dead. 

If you're trying to be an indie author, the first thing you need to do is change your Twitter photo. Do not take a picture of yourself with a webcam. Do not scan your High School yearbook photo. Take a nice head shot. Otherwise, you could wind up looking at me with googly eyes while I'm trying to enjoy social media.  Michele Bachmann Eyes Always double- and triple-check your photos before you upload them to Twitter. Have a picture of your face taken by someone who likes you. Look at yourself in the mirror and practice your author pose. If you don't do this, you could end up with Michele Bachmann face. Don't have  profile that looks like this picture of Jon Stewart. He's making fun of Michele Bachmann here, but I see people on Twitter who look like this all the time.

I always thought that automatic spell check was one of the greatest inventions of modern man. I thought that until about a week ago, when I realized all at once that spell check has actually ruined me as a writer. This is a cautionary tale to warn you about how spell check may also be ruining you. Please, proceed with care. How Do I Hate Thee It happened just the other day. I had cut-and-pasted something from Word into Google Drive, or vice versa. It doesn't really matter. The point is, I was proofreading what I'd just written. I didn't realize that spell check hadn't yet kicked in. 

I've said this several different times, and in a few different ways, but here it is: it's really, really hard to be a writer. It's hard in ways you won't think of and hard in ways you can't even imagine. It doesn't get easier. And even if you still want to do it after reading that, and I know you do, you have to ask yourself a question: can you always come last? Because when you are a writer, you probably will.  From Hero to Zero Even if you don't use an entirely different pen name, like I do, you have to create an entire new persona when you're in author mode. You can't put all your opinions out there on social media, you have to stay polite and professional even when someone is coming at you with criticism, and above all you've got to keep writing . You have to write, and you have to research. You have to edit. And of course, you've got to promote. Then you've got to make the cover, and the trailer, and write a blurb...  ...

Now available for pre-order!! Smashwords Amazon Kobo “All set for your school project?” As always, my mom was standing at the stove when I entered the kitchen the next morning. Dad was long gone on the boat, out fishing. He would finish up about the same time I finished school, leaving him free to greet me when I came home. For as long as I could remember, my mom sent me off to school in the mornings and my dad was there to make sure I got home in the afternoons. By that time, mom was usually standing out on the deck—or by the bay window, in bad weather—looking out at the ocean. “I think so.” I slipped into my usual chair at the kitchen table, still trying to hold onto the dream I had during the night. I could only vaguely remember bits and pieces of it, but I was sure it involved Luke, and I was pretty sure we kissed in the dream. If only I could remember what it was like, maybe I wouldn’t make a fool of myself if he ever kissed me for real. After the two false sta...

It's not enough to have a great idea that's really interesting. It's not enough to plan carefully, and work out a perfectly precise outline. It's not even enough to create highly engaging characters. You've got to really sink into the story, until it comes so naturally you're practically speaking in an accent to your family members.  Drowning In It Here's an example of what I mean: my newest book is about a girl who's always lived her life by the ocean. I have not. But in the book, I used quite a few different metaphors and phrases that are ocean-related. But I didn't have to think about using them or struggle to put them in. That's what being in the zone means, I think. When you're really deep into the story, things that fit into it just start coming to you naturally. 

The word unless is a tricky one, but sounds so nice writers like to use it anyway. I was writing something the other day with unless , and had to stop. I stared at the screen. And I realized that I didn't know if you're always supposed to use a comma with unless or not. I had to find out. Now, I'm going to tell you.  Unless You Want to be Wrong Unless is often used as a subordinate clause, and don't worry. That's the most confusing thing you'll read in this post. To answer the question, no. You don't have to use unless with a comma all the time. But knowing when not to do it does get pretty tricky.

Some of my Twitter followers may know that I have only recently emerged from a battle, me against my newest book cover. And in addition to getting a few (invisible) scars, I learned an important lesson about doing it yourself. Even when you have to step outside of your own skill set, sometimes -- most of the time -- you have to do it yourself first. It's a lot easier to move forward from there.  The Starting Point It all started when I had to hire someone to do my book cover . I don't have a standard person that I use, mostly because I want every cover to look really different (because they're different books). So I used the site that I like to hire an artist. And I hated the cover. Things got a whole lot worse from there. 

The phrase in to and the word into are not interchangeable. In fact, they have totally different meanings and you're supposed to use them different ways. Honestly, if you use them the wrong way most people aren't going to notice. But if you are on a quest for grammar perfection, you're in the right place. Because I know what the differences between them are. Not That Into You Grammatically, saying he's just not that into you is not correct. It should always be in to you . But how do you know the difference? To get technical about it, into is a preposition . When used in a sentence, it indicates movement. Something is happening when into comes into play. In and to , by contrast, are used to indicate position. It's not quite as confusing as it sounds right now. 

Have you ever read a Sherlock Holmes story? I ask because of a specific technique that the author, Sir Arthur Conan Doyle, often used. As you probably know, Sherlock Holmes always rather miraculously solved very complex mysteries. What you may not know is that Holmes generally solved these mysteries at the very beginning of the book. It's not until the end that he reveals how he noticed mud on the pant leg, or scratches on the back of so-and-so's hand, or some other incredibly important clue that you, the reader, was never made aware of in the first place. It never failed to piss me off, and I hope you'll pardon the language. The point is, maybe I could have solved the mystery as well. But nobody ever told me about the mud on the pant leg. The author chose to be ambiguous. And I don't think I'm the only reader out there who prefers that writers be straightforward instead. 

In life, you should never go around kicking innocent little kittens (or even mean and nasty kittens). You shouldn't throw a rock to break the window, or step on that person who fell down, or stomp on a plant just because you think it shouldn't be growing there. Never do those things in your daily life. But when you're writing your books, you should be doing them all the time. You're an author. And I hereby give you permission to give in to your cruel streak. Being Vicious  Being cruel to the characters in your books goes way beyond simply killing them. Killing a character is difficult, yes, but it can all be done with a few paragraphs, really. But making a character suffer? That takes a certain level of sadism, a particular brand of cruelty. It takes meanness. And you've got it in you. The question is: can you bring it to the surface and put it down on the page for the entire world to see?

A lot of people who like to give advice to writers say that you have to write from your own experience. You've got to write what you know , they say. Some authors even go out to experience life before they write. But I find that the best way to write is just to sit down and write. That doesn't leave a lot of time for living. Never worry. There's another way to force inspiration to come to you, and you can still pull from your own life experiences...sort of. Because the way I'm going to tell you to do it, you don't actually need to have the experiences that you're going to write about.  The Writer's Life for Me  People ask me where I get my ideas, and my answer is always the same: by asking questions . You don't need to have a bunch of life experience to write about. To be a writer, there's really only one thing you need (outside of a rudimentary command of the English language): an imagination. If you've got that, all the rest is goi...

Do any serious reading on Twitter at all, and at some point (probably within 10 minutes) you're going to find some trite little piece of advice from some famous writer. Mark Twain doesn't want you to use the word "very," Salinger can't stand the semicolon, so-and-so wants you to be descriptive. And on and on and on it goes. I hate reading these little bon mots -- hate it . Every time I see some little gem of wisdom from some well-known author, I always have the same thought: easy for you to say .  Excuse Me While I Roll My Eyes I used to read author origin stories. Meaning, I would hunt down various interviews so I could see actual quotes of how they got started as authors. I actually spent time doing this. And without fail, it made me angry every single time. That's why I have no patience for all the little bits of wisdom floating around on Twitter now. I've read all that advice, and I know a lot of the back stories. I've heard what authors...

I'm pleased to announce the title of my newest book, to be released in December. Song of the Sea is the first book in a brand-new trilogy called Saltwater Secrets . What's it about? Watch the trailer! 

The holiday season is a special time of year, and plenty of writers have used that to their advantage. Stories about Santa Claus, believing and the holiday spirit are always going to be popular. But few are destined to gain the sort of love and popularity enjoyed by Miracle on 34th Street , one of my all-time favorites. You've probably seen the movie, but what do you know about the book? The Book Valentine Davies wrote Miracle on 34th Street in 1947, as a companion novelette for the film released the same year. It was actually published by 20th Century Fox, who also made the film, but it's managed to stand on its own and has sold millions of copies. The book introduces readers to Doris Walker, a rather cold career woman who works for Macy's. She's managing personnel for the famous Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade, and must fire the Santa Claus she's hired at the last minute when he turns up drunk. She hires bystander Kris to take his place, ...

I'm in a toxic relationship. It's not easy to admit or to talk about, but there it is. I have such a bad relationship that it seeps into everything I do...and almost everything I write. And as a writer who's having this toxic relationship, it's impossible for me to write about this relationship without giving readers a skewed, distorted viewpoint. But I know that I can't fix this toxic relationship...so I've found a way to make it work with my writing. If you have a personal issue or some strange quirk, you can't ignore it. You can't write around it. All you can do is embrace it...just like I have. The Girl with the Most Cake Those of you who follow my colleague Annalisa Crawford may be aware that I've been engaged in a battle with my toxic relationship for years. I am winning, but not without casualties. My toxic relationship is with food. We've been having a torrid love-hate relationship since...well, perhaps since I ...

Food and books go well together. When you're nice and full from your Thanksgiving feast, there's nothing as sweet as curling up with a good book. They seem to encourage snacking, and sometimes a book is so good it's difficult to pull one's eyes away to bother with looking at dinner. Why not cut right to it, and add food directly into your books?  Even Characters Have to Eat Everybody eats. It's one of the universal truths that ties all human beings together. I live in Kentucky, in the United States, and passionately love books and basketball. But when it comes to food, I'm not so different from the boy working on a farm that has no electricity in Asia  -- because I eat it, too. And that brings us right back to why you want to add food to your books.  Realism Anything that makes your characters feel more real to readers is a good thing, and there's nothing like food to do that for you. Have your character eating pizza with fri...

The holiday season makes people feel excited for something, anxious and happy. It's a thrilling time, and it's a time when everyone's wallet is a little more open than usual. So writing about the holidays is tempting. After all, doesn't the Hallmark channel need new movies about Christmas every single year? Obviously holiday stories are in demand. So why shouldn't you write about them?  Don't worry -- I'm going to tell you why.  My Thanksgiving with YouTube Let me start by telling you a story, since I am a storyteller. I was planning a pretty big event about three years ago, and I was so into it I was barely sleeping at night. So a few days before Thanksgiving, I found myself cruising forums at 3am. It's not as bad as it sounds -- it was a party-planning forum. And there was a link to a YouTube video, and I'm a sucker for those.  It ends up being a video diary of this Australian guy who was getting the wrong email. A...

How often do you speak your more intimate thoughts aloud to an empty room? Probably not often, but writers use this little trick all the time. And frankly, it's bad writing. Don't do this, I beg of you. Many people do not have conversations with themselves aloud, so I don't know why so many authors are making their characters do it.  Disclaimer Don't get me wrong. I have talked to myself. Catch me in a store during the Christmas season, and you may even see me having a rather animated talk with myself. But rarely do I ever stand in the middle of a room and pour my heart out to the walls. When I'm talking to myself, it's much more "didn't I buy that last year?" and "Well, if I knew what her size was..." It's not "I always wanted Ronnie to love me. I don't understand why he doesn't. Maybe it's because I talk to myself so much." See the difference? 

So, I got all excited about writing this particular story. It completely fired my imagination; I found myself shirking other responsibilities just so I could research . Who does that? Anyway, I was thrilled about it so I started writing it. But then, something just didn't feel right. I tried forcing more chapters, but it just didn't sit well with me. Eventually, I had to put the book aside...and ended up writing an entire other novel instead. Then, just the other day, all the answers came to me out of nowhere. Knowing when to stop is a big part of being an indie author.  Hitting the Brakes There are going to be times when you've got writer's block. There are going to be scenes in your book that are difficult for you to write. There are going to be times when you're physically and emotionally exhausted, and writing feels impossible. There are moments when you've got to force it and get the writing done. But then, there are times when you really do need...

Please, take a moment to look at the image on this post. What do you see when you look at it? You may think you're seeing a box. You may take it one step beyond, and call it a moving box. It's the holiday season. Maybe it's a gift box. Maybe you're morose, and you see someone's home when you look at it. But I'm here to tell you that this is not a box. This is the box that was used to move the very first kidney used in the very first transplant in the country. And I want to tell you the story of that box.  When you're a writer, you have to know how to take a regular box and turn it into a story. But a regular story of an ordinary moving box isn't enough. I have a question to ask you: what's your angle? 

Remember when you were growing up and your parents or parental figures told you "just be yourself?" When you become an indie author, you've got to disregard all that advice. In a way, the author's career hinges upon the opinions of others.And that means the last thing you really want to do is be yourself. What other people think is very, very important...and it's going to be harder to face than you think.  What I Think... What other people think of you as an author is important, and if you don't use a pen name then how you act in life becomes a part of the picture as well. I always advocate using pen names because it's the easiest way to keep your true self and your author persona separate. As an author, you can't get political or religious or express too many opinions. That might affect your readers. The exception is, of course, if you write political or religious books. But if you write ordinary genre fiction, you've got to keep it...

Every writer has to create a world for their books, even if their books are based in a real time and place. You still have to create that in the reader's mind out of nothing. You may have a reader who doesn't know what living on he beach is like, and that means you have to be the one to tell them. No matter what sort of setting you're creating, do yourself a huge favor. Base it on an actual place that you can find on a map. Pick a Real Place for Your Setting, Or Else No matter where your book is taking place, you must give your readers some frame of reference. If you can make me understand that snow is frozen water and it's capable of falling from the sky in soft, icy little pieces, you've done your job as a writer. But you can never make me understand what glub is when it gets on your hands unless you can compare it something I do understand. If you tell me that glub has a slimy texture, I'll get that. You have to do the same sort of thing with you...

Starting a scene when it's already in the middle of the action can be a good way to grab a reader's attention right away. Starting a book this way can be especially arresting. But at some point it goes from being attention-getting to being just plain jarring. No one likes feeling like they've showed up 10 minutes late, and all the really good stuff has already happened. When it comes to writing a scene in progress, a light touch is the best touch.  What Did I Miss? Setting up scenes can begin to get a little tedious, from a writer's point of view. You've got to figure out where Sally has been and which door she's using. Why is T.J. in the room and what has he been doing? How does it all start, what makes it all exciting? And on and on...and on. When you begin the scene already in the middle of the action, you've cut right past all this nonsense. But how much of that setup does a reader really need to keep themselves anchored in the scene? That...

The holiday season is approaching quickly, and it's time to start thinking about gift-giving. So give yourself a few handy items this year to make it easier for you to write. It's time to make out your writing gift list. Gifts for Writers   There are several items that will make writing easier and allow you to be more productive. Give yourself the gift of getting more done in the coming year.  iPad shower curtain: This is a real thing, and it's totally cool. The shower curtain has a waterproof sleeve in it so you can still work while you're in the shower. Since I'm constantly looking for new ways to work, I think this thing is amazing.  Writer's Market: You don't have to get it in print, but you do have to get it if you want to traditionally publish . The Writer's Market has information about agents and publishers that will help you take the traditional path. Cooling pad: Save your laptop some work by getting yourself a cooling pad...

How carefully do you watch other people? How often do you try to figure out why they said something, or did something, that you didn't understand right away? I'm not talking about obsessive behavior. I'm talking about observation, the power of paying attention. And if you want to be a better writer, you should start doing it.  My Eyes on You If you want to be a better writer, I have some easy advice: pay attention. Observe the people and the world around you, and then take that one step further. Don't just be a better writer. Become a great one. 

There are many different narrative styles out there, and writers use them in all kinds of ways. But one of the trickiest is the stream of consciousness. If you hear thoughts inside your head all day every day, you still might not be able to pull this off. But if you want to really challenge yourself and write something different and amazing, this can be a great way to do it. Voices in My Head The stream of consciousness style of writing is relatively new when compared to the rest of the world of literature. It was first applied to a novelist in 1918. In short, this writing technique is an inner monologue that never stops. It's the character's every thought. Sometimes, it even lacks punctuation. If that sounds really difficult to write, it's because it is.

No one is a born writer, contrary to what they may say. No infant comes out of the womb with story ideas. You've never heard of a writing prodigy who was completing novels at age 6. It is a learnable skill, one that you can hone and sharpen. There are ways you can become a better writer. Start using them.  Practice Makes Perfect Remember when you learned to drive a car? You were shaky and unsure of yourself behind the wheel the first time. But when the car didn't go careening into the river and kill you right away, your confidence began to grow. You started to feel a little more comfortable. Now, you're whipping in and out of parking spots, burning rubber all over the city and fixing your hair while you set the air conditioning. We at Jade's blog advocate safe driving at all times. Please stay responsible.  The point is, the more you drove the better you got at driving. Writing is like that, too. 

In my frequent quest to discover new writing advice and various tips, I come across lots of bad ideas that just aren't going to work. Instead of laughing at them alone, I thought I'd share some of the craziest ones I've discovered recently. Just remember: don't follow this crazy advice for writers. These Are Not My Tips Remember, this is not my advice. These are crazy tips I've collected online that I'm convinced aren't going to work out well for anyone. I'll be explaining exactly why they won't.

Somebody asked me about being a writer the other day, and I told them what I always tell everyone: I don't recommend it. The person replied that they know it's hard, but they don't expect to make any money from their writing anyway. It's a romantic notion, isn't it, to simply write for the love of writing? But long gone are the days when the noble artist could be sponsored by a wealthy patron, some sort of Duke or maybe even a King, and simply do their writing for the love of it. You can't eat words. So maybe it's not about the money, but it's still going to be about a whole lot of hard work. When you don't even get money for doing it, you're setting yourself up for a long, hard, uphill walk. It's Not About the Money, Money, Money If you're not into writing for the money, that's just swell. But you're going to have to be into something for the money, unless your last name is Vanderbilt and then this doesn't apply...

I could tell you that the parched ground was swept clean of leafy hues under the enkindled sunlight . But it would be a lot simpler if I simply said there was no visible green on the desert ground under the burning sun . Wouldn't it? Here's my point: there are at least 15 different ways to say green . But why not just use the word green ?  She Fell in Love with a Thesaurus The messages that writers get are confusing. We're told that our words need to be descriptive and compelling. That our stories must captivate and entertain, evoke emotions and leave a deep impact. It's easy to read into the advice, and assume that it's always better to choose more complicated words. Why say that Jerry laughed , when you can say he chortled ? I'm actually about to tell you why, and it comes down to this basic advice: when it's green, just say green. 

"I absolutely loved the story...I definitely didn’t see the ending coming!"   "The plot twists, interesting characters and easy-to-read prose makes this novel a perfect read for a nice afternoon or evening off." Hope's Rebellion has been reviewed at Me Love Books. Check out the full review to find out why the reviewer almost didn't read it at all (and how happy they are they did anyway, of course).  Get your copy of Hope's Rebellion

The days of Jane Austen and Louisa Mae Alcott are over. No longer do authors sit in romantic little rooms, cut off from the rest of the world. Now, authors need to be in the public eye. Indie authors have to be public figures. They have to be exposed. And when you're exposed, you are a target. Are you really ready for that ? In the Line of Fire I've blogged a lot about marketing and promoting books. I've written about Twitter and blogging and being on forums and all the other stuff that indie authors have to do. What I have failed to mention is the consequences of all this public exposure. I have failed to mention that you are making yourself a target. Now, it's time to take a look at the dark side of your marketing.