Writing 101: Shock Value

A long time ago, people who wanted to sell papers would stand in the streets and shout the headlines. Sounds a bit crazy, sure, but just envision it for a moment. You're on your way to work, head still in a bit of a morning fog, and you hear someone cry "Killer Bees Heading This Way! Read all about it!" You're totally going to stop, right? Like, what's the point of rushing to work if you're going to potentially be fatally attacked by bees? What I'm really trying to share is this: shock value can be used to sell things. 

Boo!

It happens all the time, as a matter of fact. Remember the "your brain on drugs" commercials? How about the anti-texting commercials that make you feel terrible? The sad dog commercials where someone sings a horribly depressing song? Shock value. Certain ads are designed to shock your senses. They want to show you something so frightening, so depressing, so surprising that you react and you remember it. You can use that same technique in order to sell more books. 

Writing 101: We Can All Make Money with Self-Publishing

Being an indie author usually means eating a lot of noodles and salad for dinner, putting in long hours and maintaining a "day job" to boot. But if you aren't making money selling a lot of books, you shouldn't necessarily resign yourself to a life of noble poverty. There are many different ways to earn an income with self-publishing, and you never even have to write a word. 

Money, Money, Money

Self-publishing has been going through a bit of a boom in recent years, and the authors definitely aren't making all the money. As the number of independently-published books has grown, so have the amount of services available to authors. There's a huge market out there for indies. Tap into it, and you can also make money in this newly-rediscovered industry. 

Writing 101: Responding to Reviews

Lots of indie authors who like to give advice will tell you not to respond to reviews when you get them, particularly the negative ones. I'm not one of those authors. Responding to reviews isn't just a good idea -- it's your duty. 

Thank You Cards

When I was little, I had to write thank you cards for everything. Birthday, Christmas, Easter baskets -- I was told to say thanks for it all. I hated it, and swore I would never deal with that nonsense again once I became adult.

And now, I'm going to tell you to do the same thing I hated to do when I was a kid. I want you to write your reviewers, and say thank you. Because you do have to respond, even to the really ugly reviews, and the response is always the same: thank you. 

Books on Film: Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer

 Rudolph is probably the most popular reindeer in Christmas culture. He's the only one with his own song, and it's a pretty popular one, to boot. You can't get through the holiday season without seeing Rudolph's special on TV or hearing his song. But both were actually based on a book. And here's the surprising part: Rudolph isn't even 100 years old yet.

The Book

Rudolph wasn't even a part of Christmas until 1939. The original story was written by Robert L. May, and today his little tale of a red-nose reindeer has become a part of the holiday celebrations around the globe. Pretty heady stuff, right?

Writing 101: Is It Ever Okay to Stop Writing?

You know those websites that feature trite advice from famous authors? I invariably end up focusing on the quotes where the authors say that you have to write every day to really be a writer. I don't do that. Does that mean I'm not a real writer? When is it okay to stop writing, to take a break from creating new books? 

Writer's Block in Rebel's Clothing?

So what if you're not just not feeling your story one day? What if you're just not inspired? Or maybe you're very busy, or sick, and you don't manage to get anything done. Suddenly now you're not a real author? 

I don't think so. Sometimes I don't want to write a thing, not even a tweet, so I don't. Since I spend about 8 to 12 hours a day at my keyboard, I think I have the right to do that. But I also think there's a line to be drawn. 

Writing 101: How Scary is Your Search History?

It’s possible I’ve been flagged as a serial killer.

I’m really not one of those conspiracy theorists who believes the government is secretly behind every major event, but sometimes I do worry about my search engine history. I know that Google keeps track of the stuff I’m looking up, so it feels totally within the realm of possibility that the government may also have this sort of power. The government probably doesn’t have as much money as Google, or anything, but I’m pretty sure they can make Google give them information. 

Getting Weird with Google

And if they can, it’s possible that my name is on somebody’s list somewhere…because I look up extremely strange stuff on Google.

I got to thinking about it the other day when I looked for authors who committed suicide, the same night I was searching for information about electronic toys. I've searched for information about legal proceedings, how to get blood out of leather, Christmas decorations, and Will Ferrell in the same week.

Writing 101: Is It Hopeless?

You know those completely delusional singers on American Idol who are the worst of the worst, yet they think they're totally amazing? Have you ever wondered...if that's you? Sometimes questions pop into my mind, and they give me new story ideas. Sometimes they pop into my head and I wonder...is it hopeless? 

Where's Paula Abdul When You Need Her? 

Wouldn't it be great if there was an American Idol for authors? You could go in and read your blurb, maybe the first page of your novel, and Simon Cowell could tell you that you're fantastic and you're going to Hollywood. What for, I don't know. I haven't worked out all the details of the show yet (American Writer), but that's not the point. The point is this: when you're an author, everyone is Simon Cowell.

Emily Dickinson was a recluse who, literally, sat in her room and wrote about death. I'm not just writing that to be colorful. Sylvia Plath achieved a fair amount of success as a poet, wrote a popular novel, and stuck her head in the oven one day. Ernest Hemingway, well-known in his own lifetime, put a shotgun to his own head. Virginia Woolf put rocks in her pockets and walked into the River Ouse. 

Here's what I'm saying: writing is dark sometimes. You have to wallow around in the ugliest part of the human condition, in some cases, really dive into terrible thoughts and emotions. Every good story needs a villain...and it's always you. You're the one who tortures the characters, you're the one who kills them, you're the one who creates it all...and you're the one who will feel all the criticism with terrible keenness.

Writing 101: Reinventing Yourself

You know how they say that once you learn how to ride a bike, you never forget? Writing a book is like that. Once you know how, you can always write another book. That's why when you're an author, reinventing yourself is easy. Well, sort of. My point is this: you can always reinvent yourself. 

Starting Over

When you're an author, you can always start over if need be -- especially if you're going to be an indie. As an indie author, you control everything. You're in charge of your pen name, your social media accounts, all the stuff you put on the Internet and every image you share. And at any point, you can decide to start all over again if you want.

It's not easy to start from scratch, and it will take months and even years for you to build up a fan base from nothing at all. But you're an author, so you know how to build a new character better than anyone.